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martin shaw Profile
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Banned user

Registered: 11-2011
Posts: 382
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Earth worms


d

Last edited by martin shaw, 2/3/2012, 4:11 pm
12/19/2011, 5:04 pm Link to this post Email martin shaw   PM martin shaw Blog
 
Frank Baron Profile
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Old Crow

Registered: 11-2011
Posts: 2147
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Re: Earth worms


I like this.

Playing God, or wishing you could. But the first line and last indicate helplessness - an ungod-like trait indeed.

We humans are frail creatures in so many ways. But we are also capable of great feats.

Call me foolish but I have great faith in humankind.*



*You have just witnessed why I rarely comment on posted work. Mostly it's because I suck at it. But also I tend to go off on tangents...oh look! Something shiny!!


---
You can observe a lot just by watching - Yogi Berra
12/19/2011, 7:26 pm Link to this post Email Frank Baron   PM Frank Baron Blog
 
cbets57 Profile
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Heron

Registered: 03-2006
Location: La Crosse WI
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Re: Earth worms


So deep - I really liked the smokey intensity of this.

The misguided core is interesting. Author who believes s/he has more power than s/he really does. I would really like to see you expand on this and bat it out of the park, so to speak. But, then again, there is at least one who doesn't think I know what I'm talking about when it comes to poetry. So, I leave this up to you.

C

Last edited by cbets57, 12/19/2011, 9:26 pm


---
Cindy
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martin shaw Profile
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Banned user

Registered: 11-2011
Posts: 382
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Re: Earth worms


I was born and raised, then erased; my head stuck above a pulpit, un-capped, ‘monkial matter laid bare, shrivelling from the twinkling eye of a spoon.

They, dig, dig-dig-dig-dig, dig dig, dig-dig the whole day through.

I am exoskeleton, Me!- the locust, empty, from you.


Last edited by martin shaw, 12/20/2011, 1:30 pm
12/20/2011, 1:29 pm Link to this post Email martin shaw   PM martin shaw Blog
 
martin shaw Profile
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Posts: 382
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Re: Earth worms


Frank, you make me laugh. You are so much better than me.

CB

I can teach you, me, tis all. Is that big headed?

You have talent, but need leading to your alley.

Felicity, Felicity is saving her work. She is very competitive. Watch out the world.

Frank is really T.H. White, reborn and a great talent.
12/20/2011, 1:48 pm Link to this post Email martin shaw   PM martin shaw Blog
 
cbets57 Profile
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Heron

Registered: 03-2006
Location: La Crosse WI
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Re: Earth worms


Oh, I wasn't referring to you, Martin. Someone else from the "other" site.

---
Cindy
12/20/2011, 2:24 pm Link to this post Email cbets57   PM cbets57
 
martin shaw Profile
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Registered: 11-2011
Posts: 382
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Re: Earth worms


I can help you be you

and I wont chat you up
12/20/2011, 2:33 pm Link to this post Email martin shaw   PM martin shaw Blog
 
martin shaw Profile
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Registered: 11-2011
Posts: 382
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Re: Earth worms


I think you'd make a pretty darn good critique, Frank. It's all honesty
12/21/2011, 4:41 am Link to this post Email martin shaw   PM martin shaw Blog
 
Felicity Jane Profile
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Sparrow

Registered: 12-2011
Posts: 154
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Re: Earth worms


quote:

martin shaw wrote:

Frank, you make me laugh. You are so much better than me.

CB

I can teach you, me, tis all. Is that big headed?

You have talent, but need leading to your alley.

Felicity, Felicity is saving her work. She is very competitive. Watch out the world.

Frank is really T.H. White, reborn and a great talent.



Thanks Martin, that's kind! Now if I could just get competitive (something I am so not!) maybe the world should watch out.... LOL sweet....

12/25/2011, 8:04 pm Link to this post  
 
martin shaw Profile
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Banned user

Registered: 11-2011
Posts: 382
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Re: Earth worms


Well, I think so.

Anyway, we'll see
12/30/2011, 4:42 pm Link to this post Email martin shaw   PM martin shaw Blog
 


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